The last 24 hours have proven to be testing...I didn’t sleep much if at all last night. Baby Lulu was just not settling. My ass is sore because I sit in that chair all night long....sleep nursing. Universe a lazy boy recliner would be such a blessing. Today at one point I had both of my sweeties crying one from her swing and the other at my feet reaching up at me. I was preparing lunch but the crying didn’t stop when lunch was ready. Kaia was angry with me because Teddy wasn’t allowed to sit on her lap while we ate lunch. After persuading her to put Teddy in his own chair and give him a few bites of lunch she was settled to eat. Sometimes it is such a test of wills between the two of us both so stubborn.
   Nap time...ohh nap time of course one napped and one cried. I look at the looming mess all over my living room my un showered smelly self and the laundry and and and.....oh I had my fingers crossed that my littlest will nap so I can at least shower. Luckily she did let me shower but only that. She hung out with me while I toweled and blow-dried. I figured if she was going to fight a snooze she might as well have a bath too. So now both babes sleep. I don’t smell and my house is somewhat “tidy”. Everything is so much work these days. I need to stop and remind myself to be take a breath and relax enjoy the moment. I have learned with my first that time just flies so quickly by I don’t want to wish any of it away, even the difficult times. Oddly enough week two is proving to be more difficult than week one with Erick back to work.

peace for the moment

Ahh I love weekends. Erick is home from work and chaos is somewhat settled. Right now is the season for “shed hunting”. To explain the deer and elk lose their antlers this time of year and my husband loves to hike all over the valley to find these antlers. Luckily Kaia loves to go in the back pack and hike with Erick. They have hiked everyday this weekend and yesterday they hiked twice. Erick says that Kaia sings and talks the whole hike. She loves the fresh air and the scenery and I love the couple of hours of quiet at home, well when Luka is napping that is. Erick and Kaia are on a hike right now Luka is in her swing post bath bliss I suppose and I am sitting on this computer coffee in hand. I can’t really complain. Oh and my wonderful husband just washed my floors.....peace.
The snow is melting and I am so very happy that spring is starting to spring. Bundling my babies is so much work I can’t wait until I can go outside and all I have to apply is hats and sunscreen. But I am sure I will find something else to complain about when that time comes.
  My itch to get out of this town has not subsided it still lingers we just haven’t scratched it yet. We have been talking a lot more about it lately. Moving doesn’t seem like it is going to be easy for us. We are being really cautious and picky. We don’t want to take a pay cut and I don’t know if I like the idea of Erick working away. Erick going back to working on tools as an electrician would mean a pay cut and it doesn’t seem like there are many planning jobs around. Something just might have to give though....a sacrifice made....money is so evil. The houses here are selling....so I do feel like it is a great time for us to get a move on. Oh life why do you have to be so complicated. Universe...PLEASE I beg.....
   For now though I will bask in my momentary peace.....

My baby girl has arrived...

Luka Ann Canlas born Feb 16^th....she almost made it on her Lolo’s birthday but this little girl wanted her own special day. Mom has gone home and Erick is back to work Luka is three weeks old today and the routine and reality that I have two children is starting to set in. I have survived my first week with Erick back to work and I actually managed to get to two play groups. My poor little Kaia gets so bored when we are home for a day without doing anything. Her boredom translates as a whinny unhappy little girl, which then usually results in a whinny unhappy Mama. So although packing up my little girls is a lot of work it does pay off. I would have to say though my house is a pig sty....fitting in cleaning is still on my agenda of things to figure out.
    Finding the time to sit on the computer, knit, sew or anything by myself between naps, meals and nursing has proven challenging. I often have one in my arms and one pulling my finger to take me to her room to play. This is her favorite thing to do. She just loves to have us sit with her in her room while she plays. She tried grabbing Luka’s little hand to come and play with her. Luka now joins us as we hunker down on the floor and watch Kaia play and make a mess. When Kaia naps I am usually found trying to fit Luka and my laptop on my lap while I nurse her. Just for that brief little bit of mindless wonder.
   Everything is still here there and everywhere....and I don’t really know what is up or down sometimes but I am surviving and determined that when all this dust settles I will have figured out how to have some time for myself...a relatively tidy house and a happy healthy couple of girls.....