Today

My birthday has come and gone....and I spent it exactly how the day allowed. I was feeling less than good. Nauseous, tired basically the day was filled with a weird watery cheek yucky after taste feeling. So the couch and my jams were my best friend.
   I was brought to tears the other day. I asked Erick to get Kaia ready for bed and yet there was the messy kitchen still to tackle before I retired...and take note the time was before 8 pm. I was going to slump on the couch and wait for Erick to hand me my jammed little baby ready for her pre bed time nurse. But I scoffed and found some energy to start cleaning the kitchen. Erick came in the kitchen and basically stole the plates from my hands...Stop he said “I’ll do it”. I tried real hard not to show the water welling in my eyes....I just tried to explain to him that I am feeling so useless around here lately. I’m always asking Erick for help or to take over a task. I just want my life back I want to feel better. I feel like Kaia isn’t getting my full attention and I feel like house is falling apart. The house ok ya I can get over that...but my poor baby. These are days I won’t get back ever and I want to make them memorable. Blah! Enough complaining.
   Apart from my last few weeks of feeling shitty how is today? Today is going good. We woke at 6am that seems to be Kaia’s new routine since she has been sleeping through the night like a rock star. I love her new night routine. I still wake up through the night I don’t know if it’s my habit from Kaia or what but when I do I check the good old video monitor to see how my power sleeper is doing. Most all of the time she is on the complete opposite side of the bed or flipped over but she is still fast asleep. I am happy to know that at some point in the night she woke or stirred and managed to find her way back to slumber land without me or a peep. So anyways....we woke early this morning as our new usual had a good breakfast and play session and Kaia is already down for her first nap time. Taylor my littlest sister is here for a visit for the week...or for however long she wants to stay. She is fun to have around and she is a big help entertaining Kaia. Actually Taylor and I have been spending most of the time giggling at Kaia as she has been entertaining us. Kaia’s personality is starting to come through....well personality/attitude. She shakes her head no at any question you ask her whether she knows the context or not it is pretty funny most of the time.
   Yesterday when my Dad dropped Taylor off he asked Kaia if he could pick her up she shook her head no. He then asked her again she still shook her head no....he asked her a final time and she blew a huge raspberry at him basically saying “I SAID NO”. My poor Dad....but boy did me and Taylor laugh.
Today could be spent at the park and maybe pool.....but who knows Kaia is still sleeping and I have managed to sweep the floors and do a load of laundry. That is huge these days....I’m content with that alone. However....I have a 9 month and 14 year old to hang with for the day so I am sure the day will be fuller than a couple chores complete.
   Oh one thing I am left wondering if any moms out there have some advice is.....when you started with the one nap a day...instead of the two naps...morning and afternoon. I don’t know how to tell what the signs Kaia is ready to do the transition.